Another year older, another year closer to middle age.

Today is my birthday. My thirty sixth birthday to be exact. I am officially closer to 40 than 30 and although I sat and cried as 30 approached, I feel oddly at peace today. Carrie let me sleep in this morning and Isaac crawled in next to me to keep me warm until it was time to get up. Every time I stirred, I heard the soft thump thump of his tail on the comforter. Carrie’s dad woke me up to tell me happy birthday then my mother called as I was pouring my first cup of coffee to sing me Happy Birthday. I made the grave mistake of interrupting her midway through, prompting her to start all over again. Not wanting to endure hours of cheerful singing before I finished my first cup of coffee, I let her roll with it the second time. My co-worker brought me white cake with raspberry icing which is the best breakfast I could have hoped for on my birthday. She also brought me egg nog waffle mix and butter maple syrup. Yum! No, you cannot have her.

So far thirty six is proving to be quite nice. Sure I have had moments when inwardly I think, shit, soon I’ll start with hot flashes, night sweats, hormonal hell, ass sagging, wrinkle accumulation and everything else that comes with age but I’m thinking that is a longer ways off than I once believed. How foolish I was to begrudge aging. With age comes the realization that the older you get the more control you have over your life. Ah, the old control issue. But seriously, I can spend all day on a Sunday in my pajamas doing nothing but watching a Real World marathon and no one can tell me to get dressed. I can watch the entire Grammy Awards and count on one hand (maybe even half of that) how many bands I’ve actually heard of let alone name one of their songs. I officially listen to the oldie station now and can sing along to any Rick Astley tune they play. “Never gonna give you up, never gonna make you cry…” Take that Nickelback! Sure, I still look at current fashion trends and think I wish I were young enough to wear that, but I had my time. Remember boxer shorts over leggings and rubber bracelets? Thank you Madonna. Glad to see you grew out of it also.

The best thing I have received this birthday was a card from Carrie. Yes, she gave me a wonderful, beautiful gift also but this card. This card, this card. Every once in awhile someone gives you a card that is worded so perfectly it brings tears to your eyes. The moment I read her card, standing in our kitchen in my nightgown with barely enough caffeine in my system to function, I realized that I have found someone to grow old with. That makes the aging pill a little less difficult to swallow.